Comedy, Writing

HOLLYWOODIZE THAT SHIT

We all love movies, right? But how do the movies writers come up with  all those ingenious original plot lines?  I am going to show you how (you’re welcome) by coming up with some hot movie premises simply by using the power of observation.

I take a mundane event in my fabulous life, and I hollywoodize that shit.

Mundane event #1

Bus driver stops bus mid-journey, and jumps off to do his shopping (turns out he really needed some polos).

HOLLYWOODIZE THAT SHIT.

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Bus driver jumps off bus to run away from THE BOMB he has hidden on the bus. Luckily one of the passengers is ex – CIA bomb expert Rock McHarddon who, despite his drink problem and recent bitter divorce, manages to diffuse the bomb with the assistance of sexy passenger, Leslie McFlufftits (who is probably a school girl or something). Continue reading “HOLLYWOODIZE THAT SHIT”

Comedy, Writing

How to Pitch a Movie to Hollywood!

My name is Sally Studio, renowned Hollywood scriptwriter, and I here to teach you how to pitch a movie to the big boys – the producers, directors, and keepers of those pearly celluloid movie gates. Firstly you need to have written a movie. That’s very important. Secondly it should either have explosions, a quippy dinosaur, or an inoffensively beautiful yet passive teenage girl in it. Also a finale with real balls. My last film “Lovebomb” had a finale that doubled up as both a romantic chase sequence, where the hero had to stop the girl getting on the plane and leaving him forever, and an action chase sequence, where the hero had to stop the girl getting on the plane and leaving him forever because she was also a bomb. Continue reading “How to Pitch a Movie to Hollywood!”