My Wife, The Actress

My wife could have been the greatest actress of her generation; she could have been a star. She studied drama at one of the renowned acronym theatre schools, and was considered a natural by peers and lecturers alike. She played Shakespearean heroines with enough grace to bring reviewers to their knees, to coax tears from … More My Wife, The Actress


What is the end game of a date? Please tell me, I am an urban legend, and have forgotten about sex. I keep getting invited in for coffee and when they open up cupboards devoid of caffeinated beverages and I ask why they lied, their expectant smiles turn upside down. I see I might have … More Breeding

My Child

Originally appearing on the In Between Time Festival Gathering Storm mini site, this is a reactionary piece I was asked to write as part of my role as Festival writer. It relates to the themes of the international festival, which in 2015 was Storm. I focused on the the future prospects for my unborn child. Not like, … More My Child


I noticed you like talking about Pretzels a lot so when you returned home I ran to your door in London with a white pretzel. It had been dipped in the milky bar kid, but you shook your head at me. You did not want my pretzel. I thought it was because you just wanted … More Pretzels

When the Manic Pixie Dream Couple talk

Let’s get minimum wage jobs and talk about how we will spend our lottery wins. You can’t make art with flat pack instructions. You can’t make love with wikihow instructions, and where is Waldo? Really? You know all I wanted when I was younger was someone to drink Ribena with, to talk about Judy Blume with. But If we break up, who gets … More When the Manic Pixie Dream Couple talk